How Lady Gaga's song Bad Romance Would Change if She Had a Different Profession:

Actual lyric: Rah, rah, ah, ah, ah

If she were a cheerleader: Rah, rah, sis, boom, bah
If she were a fashion designer: Pra da, Pra da da
If she were on a show with Roy Clark: Hee Haw Hee Haw Haw
If she were a magician: Ah bra ca da bra
If she were a wee lass trundling a hoop: Tra la, Tra la la
If she were a sheep: baa baa baa baa baa
If she were creating a ruckus: Brou ha Bouh ha ha
If she were an Eli: Boo la boo la la

okay, that's enough of that.

oh wait, one more

If she made coloring books: Cray o cray o la

That song will never ever leave my head now...

Did I already do a list of phrases I'd like to bring back?

If yes, I would like to add to it "Mercy" - as in this tweet from Rachel Maddow: How have I lived this long without ever eating a roasted po' boy before? Mercy.

If not, the other ones on my theoretical list are

• My eye (my grandmother used to say this - as "in honest politicians, my eye!")
• My stars (or my stars and garters)
• Golly Moses (Grace Kelly pulls this off in High Society)
• Tight (for inebriated)
  
• Doll (so much better than chick, though I don't know why)
  

I definitely watch too many old movies.

Why I have the Best Boyfriend Ever

So today would have been my seventh wedding anniversary, if I was the sort of person who was meant to be a wife. So, pretty crappy day for me, overall.

So what do I get?

• Pasta
• Wine
• Ladies' Ninja Warrior
• A Town Called Panic - which is definitely the best movie of the year, if not the best use of celluloid ever utilized
  

Pictures from the Boathouse

Apologies for the crappy camera phone pictures - it was all I had with me...

Roles that I would go back to musical theatre for:

• The Baroness in the Sound of Music (if you've only seen the movie, you won't understand, but How Can Love Survive is one of my favorite songs in the R&H empire)
• Rosalie in Carnival (though Lily's song Mira is one of the few soprano songs I can still sing)
• Audrey in Little Shop of Horrors (actually, anything in Little Shop of Horrors)
• The Leading Player in Pippin
• Nellie in South Pacific (I don't have any of those notes any more, but it's still my favorite)
• Jenny in Threepenny Opera
  
• whoever sings Frank Mills in Hair
  

Grant's and my big idea

Eat, Prey, Love

in which our heroine is a cannibal who has to eat all of her spiritual advisers to gain enlightenment.

Please send all book contracts and movie deals to me as soon as possible. I'd like to have a Cape house by labor day...

Things I learned during my office field trip

• bowling = very bad for manicures
• me = very bad at bowling

Nerd Crushes

• John Barrowman
• David Tennant
• Felicia Day
• Nathan Fillion
  
• Neil Patrick Harris
  
• Morena Baccarin
• Jewel Staite
• Doc Hammer
  

I blame JSP and Mrs. McKender for this. I distinctly remember being cool once.

No, that's not true. I have never once been cool.

Things that Please Me

Cape Cod

Titles in my dream beauty pagent

• Miss Apprehension
• Miss Appropriation
• Miss Direction
• Miss Information
• Miss Construe
• Miss Diagnosis
• Miss Nomer

Things that I need to do before leaving for the beach this evening

• do the dishes
• pack my bags
  
• take out the trash
• make the bed
• loose 20 pounds

sigh.

Things I have in common with my boyfriend’s ex (as I discovered from her twitter feed)

A love of Martin McDonagh
A penchant for vintage bathing suits
A fascination with mermaids
An obsession with Doctor Who


I think in another life we would have been friends. Strangely, I don’t think that’s true of my boyfriend and my ex…

Things That Please Me

That they overturned Prop 8 because Gender no longer forms an essential part of marriage; marriage under law is a union of equals.

Bonus thing that pleases me - the sign that one guy was holding that said "I didn't get to vote on your marriage!"

and here's the Prop 8-the Musical video

don't get me started on our president, however...

A Few Cinematic Places Where I Would Like to Live

• Roman Holiday's Rome
• Amélie's Paris
• Martinique in To Have and Have Not
• The New York of Thoroughly Modern Millie or Newsies (if Christian Bale is still there singing and dancing)
• Ed Bloom's stories in Big Fish
• Most, but not all of The Adventures of the Baron Munchausen